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Topic: 20 years ago I lost a brother and gained magic
Message: Posted by: Jaxon (Feb 23, 2007 04:15PM)
As much as I love magic I'm sure you'll understand that I don't see that as a fair trade. I'd give up magic in a heart beat to bring him back.

I'm writing this now because yesterday marked 20 years since it happened. So I want to share the story (briefly) then I have a request, or rather a suggestion, for everyone. So please read on. This might be a little long but I want to share a little about who Paul was and some of my memories of him.

I'm one of 5 siblings. In order of oldest to youngest there's Wayne, Paul, my only sister April, me then my younger brother John.

I could go on and on telling you good things about everyone in my family but right now I'm thinking more about my brother Paul. Paul was a very special guy in a number of ways. First of all he was a very athletic guy. He was a star foot ball player and in wrestling during high school. This on top of the fact that he was a good looking guy made him very popular in school. I know, high schools are filled with "jocks" like that but Paul had something different. He was always for the underdog. He was the kind of guy who would invite "less popular" kids to join his table in the Caféteria and befriend them. He wasn't the kind or person to judge people by anything other then their attitude.

At the age of 16 he was a volunteer at a place called "The Arc" which is a place for run away kids. Kids who run away from home could go there to stay for a number of days as long as they fallow the set rules. Such as their parents would have to be notified and they would receive counseling. Paul was a sort of roll model there.

At some point in my life he took me to a cub scouts meeting because my parents had to work. My scout leader had to step down so they where looking for a new one. None of the parents could so Paul (at the age of 20) took the job.

On one trip he took us to was at a gym to play basket ball. While there a few guys where bulling a smaller guy. Paul first warned them to leave him alone. After it continued and one of them took a swing at Paul (He was also into martial arts. The guy who attempted to hit him ended up head first in a barrel (that they keep basket balls in). Paul held him there and made him apologize to the guy they where bulling. :)

Speaking of that. I remember when I was in grade school and I had a bully. My teacher told my parents that he was concerned not only because of the kids that was a bully but also because I didn't try to defend myself (I was a little guy). Paul was the one that told me, "Never start a fight but if I ever find out you don't defend yourself when someone is picking on you them I'm going to beat you up too" :)

He was also part of the "Big Brother" program when he was about 20.

Paul joined the air force at the age of 23. Most guys join younger then that so Paul became sort of like a big brother to many of them. He told us about the fact that many of them didn't believe him when he said they are still growing. So he started marking their height on the door then some months later they found they where still getting taller.

He couldn't talk to much about his work because it was in some kind of communications. One day he went for a drive after an argument with his girlfriend. He never came back because his car spun out of control and he died on impact. We came to find out that despite what the news said about the accident he was not thrown from the car and he was wearing his seat belt. We found this out from his friend who was in the car with him (Who only had minor injuries). He removed the seat belt and dragged him from the car. SO I've had a hard time believing what I read in the papers since then.

A few months later my family went to his base for a service in his honor. We meet some of his friends. We saw the door that he marked their heights. This wasn't exactly a "vacation" but they did show us around.

This is where I found my first magic shop and the beginning of "Ron Jaxon the magician". I know that Paul had something to do with that even if I can't explain it.

So, now it's 20 years later. I'm a magician now because of what I found on that terrible trip. Some good came from the bad and I never even knew magic was something I would like before that.

So now I have a wild idea I want to share and I'm going to do this myself. I'm going to think about those who are close to me and think about something they might like even if they've never told me they like it. Let me give you some examples by telling you what I'm going to do.

When my father was younger he was a pretty good artist. Very good with pastels. I never knew this about him until about 5 years ago when I found some drawings and my mother told me who made them. So obviously my Dad doesn't do this anymore. So I'm going to pick up some art supplies for him.

My mother use to play the guitar. More specifically the "Hawaiian" guitar. I'm going to try and find one for her.

This next one is going to seem kind of funny coming from a deaf guy like me. But one of my best friends has the kind of voice that always gets compliments. People are always asking him if he's a DJ or public speaker. It's just the way he talks with a powerful and clear voice. So I'm going to try and subtle introduce him to doing things with his voice. Maybe ask him to do a voice over for one of my shows or something. Or record him reading a story (story teller).

So my goal is to introduce people that are close to me to something that they might find pleasure in. For if I hadn't found that magic shop I wouldn't be here on the forum right now sharing this story and idea.

If you don't want to do this then just tell those who are close to you that you care about them. you just never know when it'll be to late.

Thanks for listening

Ron Jaxon
Message: Posted by: Destiny (Feb 23, 2007 10:20PM)

Your intelligence and humanity constantly amazes me.

It must be in the genes because you obviously share more with your brother than you seem to realize.

Please continue to share your special magic with us.

Message: Posted by: robert bianchi (Feb 24, 2007 07:45PM)
Wow Ron:

I think that your brothers life and regretable death gave you insight and introspection to not only preform magic, but also a real sense of appreciation for those who are close to you.

Your relationship with your brother must have been very special in that 20 years later you speak so deeply about him. It is inspirational.

Thank you to you and your brother for showing us what really matters... Now, that's MAGIC!!!

Message: Posted by: airship (Feb 26, 2007 12:26PM)
The best thing you can do to honor the dead is to turn your thoughts into something positive. You're doing that, Ron.

I know how tough it is to lose someone you love: it's coming up on 3 years since my wife died. You've made me start thinking about what I might do to honor her memory. Thanks.
Message: Posted by: MagiClyde (Feb 28, 2007 11:46PM)
Ron is right. Time is much shorter than you realize. They will not be there forever. At least you do have your siblings, Ron.

As for me, everyone in my immediate family...mother, father, brother & sister...are gone. My brother was the last to die a year ago in March (it's been a year already?). I have no wife or children. It is truly an odd feeling, at the age of 49, to be the last member of my family left alive...and scary too! :cry:
Message: Posted by: Jim Poor (Mar 9, 2007 06:57PM)
Lots of touching threads on the Café tonight.

Message: Posted by: Big Jeff (Mar 11, 2007 11:10PM)
My sister died 3 years ago in May, she was 37.

I'm getting a tattoo on her 40th birth, April 4th.