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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » The spooky, the mysterious...the bizarre! » » Monkey paw story. (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Moderncelt
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Thought I could give you all a chuckle with a story using a mummified monkey's paw.



Long long ago, in "Not so Merry" old England, a traveler journeying from this place to that sat in a road side pub drinking to get the road dust off his toungue.

The proprietor came up to him and said. "Friend, it appears to be getting dark out. Perhaps you should rent a space here tonight and strike out again on the morrow."

The traveler replied "Oh, I'm not afraid. I've my lucky monkey's paw right here." pulling a wizzened lump out of his pouch.

"SWEET MERCIFUL GOD! PUT THAT THING AWAY!" The proprietor yelled.

The traveler, shocked and confused quickly tucked the paw back in his pouch.

"I'm sorry." said the barkeep,"I don't mean to shock you, but if you want my advice, and believe me you do, you will take that...THING, and throw it in the nearest deep dark hole and not let anyone see you with it."

"I don't understand, it's always brought me good luck. What's wrong?" asked the traveler.

"Well I should explain." started the bar keep, "You see, it's this new King we have. He's very superstious and views magic, any magic, from weather working or fortune telling down to that little paw you have there, as a threat to the throne and punishable by death"

"Wow" said the astonished traveler,"You mean.."

"That's right. Lucky charms...They're magically seditious."
Doug Higley
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Since I make Monkey Paws I'm just happy they are not Tragically Letigious. Smile

Doug
Higley's Giant Flea Pocket Zibit
Mystician
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ARGHHH ...
What is this, this humor doing here in the bizarre section ? Smile
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Phil Thomas
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Wow. That should be in the "corny jokes" thread. That was bad. Funny, but bad.
"If we lose the sense of the mysterious, life is no more than a snuffed out candle."

Albert Einstein
Moderncelt
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Aw come on. Shaggy dog stories are great. Besides, who says you can't inject a little humor in with your bizarre routine? A little change up will throw em off.
Midnight333
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The giant brain says, "MEEEEEEEE!" That's whos says you cant! And you don't want to argue with that guy, he knows everything.
bobser
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I don't get it... it I have the best sense of humour in here as you all well know.
Bob Burns is the creator of The Swan.
Moderncelt
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Ah midnight, then I bow humbly to the giant omnitient brain. Only dry humorless bizarre magic will win the day. I'll go off to the corner and flog myself for my pun-ishment. Smile Of course Mom said I'd go blind doing that.

Bobser, it's a punny joke. Sing the ***able Lucky charms jingle to it.
Mystician
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Midnight333, have you ever considered changing your name to "Esoteric " ? You really come out with some off the wall stuff.

Bobser, you probably didn't grow up with the TV commercials we did in the states, but there's a "classic" jingle for Lucky Charms breakfast cereal that goes, "They're magically Delicious !" A leprachaun is their mascot.

ModernCelt, you might go blind but the hairy palms would be pretty cool for your monkey paw story !! Smile
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Doug Higley
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Mystician says to ModernCelt "you might go blind but the hairy palms would be pretty cool for your monkey paw story !!"

Giving away secrets are we? What the heck am I going to do with all these freakin' left handed Monkeys if everybody tries that! geesh...can't make a decent living these days...
Higley's Giant Flea Pocket Zibit
Midnight333
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Mystican, Hmm... I like that name, Esoteric... Ohhh! How about Eric Esot? That could be a good stage name. Then ony a few whack-jobs would get it. Hmm. Oh and I wish I could take credit for the giant brain thing but I borrowed the joke from a cartoon called "Futurama". The guy asks what killed all the dinosaurs and the giant brain says "MEEEEE!" but I do come up with some strange stuff, so thank you.
bobser
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Jeeeeez thanks mystician.
Yep, that truly is bad.
Bob Burns is the creator of The Swan.
Moderncelt
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Bobser, I appologise, I didn't realize you weren't here in the states. It does make a bit more sense...unfortunately... if you've heard the jingle every Saturday.
Mystician
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Midnight333, was that the professor who said that ? It sounds like it would be him. I think he was my favorite character. What a shame that Futurama never got as popular as it should have.
I'm an "Invader Zim" fan too. Ever watch that ? It got cancelled in 2002. It was waaay too dark and grown-up for Nickelodean. I mean, when you depict poor kids sitting in a corner of their filthy house munching away on a giant pile of cockroaches while their grungy filthy parents sit on the sofa watching wrestling...
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muzicman
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I love Invader Zim!! I've got all the DVD's they put out. They jusy don't make like that anymore.
Mystician
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The third and final DVD was really bizarre, wasn't it ? It got pretty strange at the end, especially for a "Christmas" special ! I loved the Halloween special the most, that was awesome.
I've heard rumors that Cartoon Network might pick it back up, but I think they're only rumors. Jon Vasquez is happy doing "Squee" and "Johnny the Homocidal Maniac". :-(
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muzicman
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I have seen it recently on Direct TV (not sure which channel). But it was an old episode that was on Volume 2. That 3rd one did get pretty strange, but then again..it's Invader Zim!! I thought they made that show just for me...LOL. Glad to see I'm not the only one that enjoyed that show.
Midnight333
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Yeah it was a good show.
hugmagic
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I had a chance to talk with David Seebach yesterday. He related to me what a big hit Mr. Higley's "Monkey Paw" was this year in his Halloween show.

As part of the pre show promo, he would set up radio interviews, hyping the paw. But he would not let them see it until he was live on the air. Their reaction to paw on the air was incredible. It helped to pack the houses.

Another testimonial to the fine work of Mr. Higley.

Richard
Richard E. Hughes, Hughes Magic Inc., 352 N. Prospect St., Ravenna, OH 44266 (330)296-4023
www.hughesmagic.com
email-hugmagic@raex.com
Write direct as I will be turning off my PM's.
Mystician
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I shall be an owner of something of Mr. Higley's artwork some day, that is a definite.
It's almost something of a status symbol.
"And here is my geniune fake made by Doug Higley .." Smile
Seriously though.. if I ever get the raise I'm supposed to get at work.. or ..Aack, I might have to resort to performing for money on the side !!
Just hanging out with the rest of my fellow dregs.
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