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Harry the Clown![]() Regular user 148 Posts ![]() |
Here's some jokes I use when making balloons for the waiting kids!
When someone wants a motor-bike. You blow up a balloon, give it to them and say, "an exhaust pipe". (Then you make then a motor bike.) When someone says, make me anything. You just give them a unblown balloon and say, "here's a wiggley worm". When making a single balloon hat! Turn it upside down and say, "a pair of underpants". here's dog balloon joke! What happened to the dog who walked between 4 trees? He didn't have a leg to stand on! Elephant joke! What do you call a elephant who doesn't have a bath? A smelly-phant. Giraffe Joke! Why do Giraffe's have long necks? smelly feet. |
Gideon Sylvan Special user Deerfield, IL 541 Posts ![]() |
In Jeff Hobson Live there are some good jokes, as well as some gags in 20 Minutes With A Balloon.
You know you are a magician when you have boxes full of lecture notes you have never read, but still are excited about going out and buying more.
www.gideonsylvan.com |
itshim![]() Elite user Milton Keynes 417 Posts ![]() |
Here are my 3 favourite one-liners if the balloon explodes :-
It was going to be a sausage dog but now its a banger! (does this make sense in US?) It was going to be a weasel but it went pop! It was going to be a parrot but now its a polygon! Nigel
I knew a man who kept saying "pliers, pincers, scissors". He was speaking in tongs.
www.itshim.co.uk |
JesterMan![]() Veteran user Maryland, USA 319 Posts ![]() |
Quote: Most of us over here wouldn't have a clue, even if you added the mash part. They would understand the "bang", but miss the double-entendre.
On 2005-07-19 18:06, itshim wrote:It was going to be a sausage dog but now its a banger! (does this make sense in US?) My favorite 'pop' line, among many, is, "Wow, you're a sharp kid!" My favorite balloon line of all, not just for pops: When making a snake with a spiral body, let all the air back out after blowing it up once, and looking sad, offering them the empty balloon, and saying, "How about a worm?"
JM
![]() ![]() Balloons, Magic, Mayhem & More! www.AArdvarkEntertainers.com www.JesterMan.com "... destined to take the place of the MudShark in your mythology... " FZ |
magicgeorge![]() Inner circle Belfast 4299 Posts ![]() |
A follow up the to the worm line is to puff a little air into the middle and say "it's a worm that's eaten an apple" (or a pregnant worm depending on the crowd).
I used to claim I was making a weasel when they popped. I had a bad run and a few burst in the space of 10 minutes and I kept saying "Och, another weasel" a little girl came up to me and said "You should stop trying to make weasels you're really bad at making them". My favourtie line when a balloon pops is saying "It's a good job it wasn't a real dog (or whatever I'm making) ,think of the mess!". I think I got that one from http://www.balloonhq.com they have quite a comprehensive list of balloon one-liners. George |
Tom Stevens![]() Veteran user Australia 361 Posts ![]() |
When making a pink dog:
"I could have used HOT pink, but then it would have been a HOT DOG." |
Carl Skenes![]() New user 96 Posts ![]() |
When asked how I learned to sculpt balloons...........
I learned the balloon basics during a work release program. (When a balloon breaks.) That's what would happen if your father did this.......now watch as I do it the right way. |
Trois![]() Special user Myrtle Beach 594 Posts ![]() |
All pops, no moms !
Not clever enough to come up with something orginal, or did I.
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magicmanfrank![]() Inner circle 1127 Posts ![]() |
Here's one of my favorites that never fails to get a Laugh, (or GROAN!).
______________________________________________________________________ -Great "EARS" Line- When you get to the Ears part of the animal you are twisting say, "And now we make the ears. It is VERY Important to make the ears. Last week I made a (name the animal you are making), and I forgot to make his ears." (Pause and then say) "I told him I was sorry, but I guess he didn't HEAR ME!" ________________________________________________________________ *~*hahahaha*~* I just LOVE that Line!!! =Frank=
The Early Bird may get the Worm, but it's the SECOND Mouse that gets the CHEESE!!!
Frank Thurston www.FrankThurstonMagic.com https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Magic-of-Frank-Thurston/116625117910?ref=nf |
Harry the Clown![]() Regular user 148 Posts ![]() |
It was funny the other day making balloons at a Mall someone said' "Boy you are good, I bet you can do that in your sleep". I thought about it for a second and then said, "YES! But I'm scared to wake up.... In the morning will my wife be a cute little teddy bear. an elegant swan or a grumpy old DRAGON."!!! It did get a laugh.
On the side I bought a DVD "secret seminars of magic with by patrick Page". he had some funny balloon business in there which could be helpful for someone who is starting out. And a cool silk trick too. |
mannimiguel![]() New user 67 Posts ![]() |
Carl,
That line is hilarious. Beautiful.. |
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