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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Sadie Hawkins anyone? (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Margarette
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Memphis area
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Okay guys, what are the rules on gals asking guys out? Does that mean the one doing the asking pays for everything? Remember, it's been a while since I've been on the dating circut. I'm tired of sitting at home when my kids are away. And, since no one is asking me, I guess it's up to me to do the asking! So, help me out here!! And please, don't tell me to use magic as a way to meet people!

Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
ColinB
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Jeepers, Margarette, when I was last single (and it's not THAT many years ago) I couldn't even figure out the rules for guys asking girls out!

Who pays for what is always tricky, especially in these days when credit and debit cards tend to prevail over cash, so it's awkward just to split the bill.

Though I'm still something of an old-fashioned man-pays-the-bill kind of guy; if I was trying to be politically correct, I would say whoever CHOOSES the venue (rather than does the "asking") pays the bill, the other person opting to choose the venue and pay next time (or cook dinner at their place, should the date go well).

Either that, or they could tip the table-hopping magician the equivalent amount (where were you thinking of going?).

Colin
hkwiles
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Howard Wiles
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Hi Margarette.

I suggest if you are doing the "asking out"
(I'm assuming it's someone you fancy) then you offer to pay. When he says "no" in true gentlemanly fashion and that "he" will pay, you can then say: "You pay next time."

That way you get to see the guy again !!

Good Luck, keep us all informed of the progress.

Howard
Magix
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I would have to disagree with Colin. I think the "asker" should expect to pay. Otherwise, it's the equivalent of saying "Would you like to take me out and buy my dinner?" (An approach that may work, actually).

But Howard is right, a gentlemen will offer to pay, and then you can take it from there.

Just remember that just because you pay doesn't mean you can have your way with him. No means No! Smile
Margarette
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Well, first I gotta get up enough nerve to actually ask him out!! Smile

Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
Greg Arce
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Go for it! It's nice to know that some women will now feel the tension we feel everytime we approach a woman for something as simple as "care to dance."
Good luck, Margarette.
Greg Smile
One of my favorite quotes: "A critic is a legless man who teaches running."
Margarette
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You know, the funny thing about all this is that I have no problem getting onstage in leather and lace with handcuffs and rope and making all sorts of innuendos....but, me asking this particular person out to a movie, and I get all tonge tied and dry mouthed. Heck, that happens even when I THINK of asking him!!

Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
illusionmaster
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Boulder, Colorado
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Margarette,

Not that I'm a religous person or anything, but what's the bible verse say... "Ask and you shall receive."

Men are sheep (no offense gentlemen) but they really dig a girl who is aggressive and goes after what they want.

If I meet a guy and think, hmmm, he could be fun to party with, a few simple batting of the ole eye lashes usually prompts them to ask me out...

If not, then to heck with it, throw caution to the wind and ask them to lunch or dinner. Not too difficult at all really...

Good luck,

Jes
Smile
Magix
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Sheep?!?!? Now I feel ba-a-a-a-d!
hkwiles
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Howard Wiles
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Right. That's enough.
You've been told what to do, now just do it ok?
You can only reply to this post from now on.
If and ONLY IF you have fixed up a date.
In which case we all want to know WHERE and WHEN.

Go Girl
Howard
Margarette
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Okay....you want to know if I ask and he says "no"?
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
ChrisZampese
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Who says you have to tell the truth!!

I think we all want to know either way, although I will put in my predicition (using all the powers available to me of course!)...

You will ask, and he will say...YES!!

Good Luck (try a 5th of vodka, it calms the nerves!)
The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion which stands at the cradle of true art and true science. Whoever does not know it and can no longer wonder, no longer marvel, is as good as dead, and his eyes are
HiveMind
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Ahemm...

Men are sheep? Do be careful with that...

There is nothing wrong with a girl asking a
guy out. I say be yourself; and you'll
be suprised at how much further you will get.

As for who pays...If a girl asked me out I
would ASSUME I would pay. If she offered to
pay, honestly I would feel weird. Its never
happened to me, but I would not try to stop
it.
"Free will is an illusion." - B.F. Skinner
hkwiles
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Howard Wiles
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Margarete.

I would be extremely suprised if any guy asked out by a women said "no."

Don't even think about being turned down.
Just do it. Tonight.

Your next posting has to be the result that you get.

Howard
HiveMind
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I've said no plenty of times. I said no when
I was proposed to as well. Let's be realistc
people; are you trying to give this person
useful advice, or just a false foundation?

Bottom line is you must appraise the
situation for yourself. If you want
encouragement then my advice is always that
you should go for it; you never know until
you try, and it cannot kill you. Even if he
is not interested he will probably be very
kind. Seize the day and all that. Life is
short; just go out and have some fun with it.

I wish for you a serendipidous delight, and the best of luck.
"Free will is an illusion." - B.F. Skinner
hkwiles
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Howard Wiles
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Hivemind,
I think it's obvious Margarette has appraised the situation. She wants to ask him out. End of story.

Howard
Geoff Weber
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Washington DC
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My personal philosphy is that if I ask someone out, I should pay for them. Not everyone shares this way of thinking, so if I was asked out, I would plan on paying for myself unless I was specifically told that they intended to treat me.
HiveMind
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End of story, what is that? She knew she
wanted to ask him out before posting, she
was only asking for our advice on ettiquette,
some people took the liberty to throw in
a whole bunch of unlooked for advice
disguised as encouragement. The advice was
ridiculous, and so I ridiculed it. Everyone
knows that bad advice unlooked for is a very
ugly monster, and Margarette would be
burdoned to take it to heart as doctrine, not
that she is that stupid.

Besides we are still awaiting the end of the
story.
"Free will is an illusion." - B.F. Skinner
Margarette
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Memphis area
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I'm working up to it!! I'm gonna call either tonight or tomorrow and ask!! He is a friend, and I don't want there to be any negative repercussions on our friendship if he says "no".

Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
Ellen Kotzin
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UPSTATE, NY
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I would agree on just doing it--ALSO agree with geoff and offering to pay.

I was agressive enought to ask my now husband out and look now! 2 pugs and 2 kids later... Smile

Ellen
harryandersonfan.com
"I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR..I"M TOO LOUD TO IGNORE!"
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