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Pete Biro
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1933 - 2018
18558 Posts

Profile of Pete Biro
I am going to buy a cheap accordian. Set up in a chair with a sign that reads: "Put money in the hat and I won't play."
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Profile of cenafreak0709
HAHHA! I love that!
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York ,PA.
1412 Posts

Profile of manal
Toys R us has the accordian you are looking for Mr. Biro.
I had one myself to play Irish Traditional tunes.
Life is too important to take seriously.
Bill Palmer
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I think Pete needs a great honkin' Hohner accordion -- one that looks like it could really do some DAMAGE.
"The Swatter"

Founder of CODBAMMC

My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups."
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Midlands, England
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Profile of DJBrenton
Bagpipes will work waaaay better. In fact, PM me your address. I'll send you some money now not to play.
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Profile of Chance
Q: What's 'perfect pitch'?

A: An accordian landing on a bagpipe in a dumpster!
Mario Morris
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Mario Morris
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Profile of Mario Morris
A friend of mine was qwite excited about his instant busker kit. It is a self playing accordian. All you have to do is pump it pretend your playing it, ie wiggle your fingers and smile as the theme music to the God farther bellows out.
As much as I dislike accordians I could not help but appreciate this expensive piece of crap. Now when I see a busker playing accordian and if they sound a bit good I all ways take close look just in case.
Keep an eye out.
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Profile of lynnef
In one of the Laurel and Hardy movies, the 2 awful musicians are interrupted by a woman who shouts "how much do you make at this corner?" They say "50 cents"; and she says "here's 50 cents, move down to the other corner". or something like that... it's been a few years since I saw the movie.
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West Coast
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Profile of SpellbinderEntertainment
Indeed here in San Francisco’s Financial District
there is a bagpipe player, with a singular lack of talent.

He plays are an intersection where office workers like to enjoy their lunch and coffee on the street near a famous statue, and will STOP playing every time someone gives him a five-dollar bill.

I suspect he makes a fine living by keeping silent during the lunch rush and coffee breaks.

I believe I know of several magicians who could also make a handsome living by offering not to perform in public….

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Agent of Chaos
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Profile of gaddy
On 2008-06-09 08:24, Chance wrote:
Q: What's 'perfect pitch'?

A: An accordian landing on a bagpipe in a dumpster!

funniest joke I've heard in weeks!
*due to The Magic Cafe's editorial policies, words on this site attributed to me cannot necessarily be held to be my own.*
Tony Iacoviello
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I play an Hohner Panther, I love it.
It keeps the cats away and does not scare the dog as much as my violin playing.

Danny Hustle
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Boston, MA USA
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Profile of Danny Hustle
I once left my accordian in my car unlocked. I came back and there were four more in there! Smile

What's the difference between an accordian and an onion? Nobody cries when you cut up an accordian! Smile



"MT is one of the reasons we started this board! I’m so sick of posts being deleted without any reason given, and by unknown people at that." - Steve Brooks Sep 7, 2001 8:38pm
©1999-2014 Daniel Denney all rights reserved.
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the Wilds of Ireland
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Profile of deadcatbounce
You may joke, but in the middle of Tralee, County Kerry, (Ireland) I saw a drunk playing a 6 string guitar with only 4 strings on, and he was using a credit card cut into a very large V shape as a plectrum. He was absolutely useless. Out of tune, no rhythm, - just a drunk with NO musical leanings.

And people were dropping cash in his basket.


I just thought - it could have been MUCH worse! He could have had a drum kit!

"With every mistake - we must surely be learning..." George Harrison.
Bill Palmer
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In 1992, the second time I was in Berlin, I was strolling through Europa Zentrum and I saw the worst excuse for this kind of thing I have ever seen in my life.

No, it wasn't a crate slug.

It was a little Gypsy boy, couldn't have been more than 3 years old, sitting on the sidewalk with an out of tune mandolin in his lap. He was strumming the strings loudly with one hand, and had his other hand stretched upward for money.

He had a very sad expression on his face. They start them young and train them well.
"The Swatter"

Founder of CODBAMMC

My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups."
Wayne Whiting
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181 Posts

Profile of Wayne Whiting
Reminds me of the busker who won his case in Alexandria, VA. He was a bagpipe player. Seems like if he could win his case, if would be a breeze for a magician.
Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. Thomas Edison
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Dargaville, New Zealand
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Profile of MagiCol
Bill, what's a "crate slug" please? From the context I guess it's a person sitting by watching the show and not not contributing any donation. How good a guess is that?
The presentation makes the magic.
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North Adams Ma.
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Profile of johnnymystic
Crate slug= people standing on crates such as living statues, etc.
I drink cheap tequila and vomit
<BR>I cannot eat hot wings...acid reflux
<BR>I never inhale Smile
<BR>I can put a field dress on a deer
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Forest Grove, Oregon
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Profile of mplegare
Pete -

If you want to go "classic", you could always make or obtain a Rommelpot.

After all, Danish buskers would go door to door playing this (sometimes referred to as the f*rt drum due to its, uh, distinctive sound) until they were given money to GO AWAY.

... I've actually done that at a few Renaissance Faires. *oomph-phrmph-wrmfph-frmf* "o/` Gimme a dollar and I'll stop playing! o/`"
Matthew Legare aka Tobias the Adequate! - - you know you want to.
ed rhodes
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Rhode Island
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Profile of ed rhodes
I remember Douglas Adams had a bit in one of his "Hitchhiker's" books where the hero and his girlfriend were walking through the park. In the background was a bagpipes player who kept getting angry at the audience; "No! Don't give me money! I'm not performing, I'm only practicing!"

And then there's the classic "Far Side" cartoon; Upper panel, a line of angels; "Welcome to heaven, here's your harp." Lower panel, a line of devils; "welcome to 4377, here's your accordian!"
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
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