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ccccchunt
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Why does 711 have locks on the doors if they are open 24 hours a day, seven days a week????

Why is toilet paper in little tiny sheets? Does anyone ever use just one?????
MAKMagic
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Quote:
On 2009-01-07 03:58, Pakar Ilusi wrote:
Why do you always shake your hands when you're holding peanuts?


LOL WHAT?!?!?

This sounds like a personal problem bro
.:Michael Kelley
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Justin Style
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Why are they called Love Handles?


Everyone I know who has them hates 'em.
MAKMagic
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Quote:
On 2009-01-07 13:12, Justin Style wrote:
Why are they called Love Handles?


Everyone I know who has them hates 'em.


There's actually a very good reason they're called that.

Think about it and get back to me.

Hey now...
.:Michael Kelley
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kcg5
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who wants four fried chickens and a coke
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Mike, he is to old



hey now?
Nobody expects the spanish inquisition!!!!!



"History will be kind to me, as I intend to write it"- Sir Winston Churchill
Destiny
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Quote:
Why are they called Love Handles?


'Love Handles' is much more poetic than 'ears'.

Destiny
Pakar Ilusi
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I hold on to the shoulders...


HEY NOW!!!
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
ed rhodes
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Quote:
On 2009-01-06 13:08, Michael Baker wrote:
My favorite Steven Wright quote: "I put some instant coffee in the microwave and almost went back in time."


Boy I'm glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that!

"I bought some batteries, but they weren't included so I had to buy them again."

"I bought a humidifier and a dehumidifier, turned them on in the same room and let them battle it out."
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
Mr. Mystoffelees
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Is a "near miss" another name for a collision?

How can there be "semi-boneless ham"?

Why is it called a "building" after it is completed? Shouldn't it then be called a "built"?

When we tear down a structure, why do we call is "razing"?

When a man says something in the woods, and no woman hears it, is he still wrong?

If you are on a meatless diet, can you still eat Spam?

"My doctor gave me 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay his bill, so he gave me another 6 months."
Also known, when doing rope magic, as "Cordini"
Pakar Ilusi
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I'll try to answer some, Mandarin...

When a man says something in the woods, and no woman hears it, is he still wrong?

YES. Ask your Wife or Girlfriend to verify this.

If you are on a meatless diet, can you still eat Spam?

I'm sure you CAN. Whether you SHOULD or not is another question.

"My doctor gave me 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay his bill, so he gave me another 6 months."

ROTFLMAO!!!! Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
ed rhodes
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My kid found Billy Crystal's "You Look Marvelous" in which "Fernando" offers up some of his wisdom;

"I'm concerned about the Cabbage Patch Kids, when they grow up, are they going to have to be told these people are not their real parents?"

"I love dancing. To me dancing is like standing still, only faster."

"Darling, do you understand the concept, 'full grown midget?' Maybe it's just me."
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
Pakar Ilusi
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A few superhero and movie question...

"Why doesn't Hulk's pants tear?"

"Why if Superman is an alien, does he look so human?"

"Why in the Matrix, does Neo (Keanu) always reload looking like himself? Just make yourself look like someone else, it'll fool the agents yah?"

"Why does Steven Seagal always plays the same character?"


Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
Pakar Ilusi
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"How does David Copperfield come out of boxes and has wind blown strongly at him yet still keep his hair-do perfectly intact?"

Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
ed rhodes
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Quote:
On 2009-01-09 23:28, Pakar Ilusi wrote:
A few superhero and movie question...

"Why doesn't Hulk's pants tear?"


Because the Comic Code would have shut Marvel down! It's not all rocket science.
(I remember when I worked at Marvel, there was an artist who did "special projects" there. While pasting up art for the 1980 calendar, she showed me a picture she'd drawn of the Hulk, naked with a large erection! The picture was captioned; "Hulk knows it's big, Hulk just wishes he knew what it was FOR!" She said she wanted to send it in with the rest of the artwork as a joke, but they'd just had a problem with something slipping past the censors and she was afraid it would have gone through by accident!)

Quote:
"Why if Superman is an alien, does he look so human?"


Because how else is he going to hide out on this planet? (Although they did later come up with the Martian Manhunter, who could shape-shift.

Quote:
"Why in the Matrix, does Neo (Keanu) always reload looking like himself? Just make yourself look like someone else, it'll fool the agents yah?"


Hey! We PAID for Keanu Reeves, by God we're gonna USE Keanu Reeves!

Quote:
"Why does Steven Seagal always plays the same character?"


Not everybody can be Albert Finney.

Smile
[/quote]
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
Pakar Ilusi
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Thank you, Mr. Ed...

I can leave this realm in peace now...

Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
ed rhodes
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Quote:
On 2009-01-05 15:37, kcg5 wrote:
I once brought up the point about the diet coke thing here, and was attacked for it. so I will shut up...


But I liked them all.


I remember w-a-y back in the 70s, that was a radio commercial for Tab. "Judy" was ordering more and more outrageous food and her friend kept trying to interrupt.
"I'll have a cheeseburger," "Judy..." "and fries," "Judy...." "and chili" "Judith!" "and a Tab." "Hold it, I thought you were watching your calories?" "I am, didn't you hear me order a Tab? That's only 1 little calorie." "Swell, what about the other 1,500?" "Well, you wouldn't want me to waste away in one day?" "No chance!"
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
Josh Riel
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of hell
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Image
Magic is doing improbable things with odd items that, under normal circumstances, would be unnessecary and quite often undesirable.
ed rhodes
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Boo Hoo, now I feel bad. (slaps wrist) Bad Ed! No cookie!
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
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