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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Best comeback of the year (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

daffydoug
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Look mom! I've got
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This one needs an award:

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial.

The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility...

Q: 'Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?'

A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.'

Q: 'Officer -- who provided this description?'

A: 'The officer who responded to the scene.'

Q: 'A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?'

A: 'Yes, sir. With my life.'

Q: 'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?'

A: 'Yes sir, we do!'

Q: 'And do you have a locker in the room?'

A: 'Yes sir, I do.'

Q: 'And do you have a lock on your locker?'

A: 'Yes sir.'

Q: 'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?'

A: 'You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room
The difficult must become easy, the easy beautiful and the beautiful magical.
Bob Clayton
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Lol!
JoeJoe
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Myrtle Beach
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LMAO



-JoeJoe
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Pakar Ilusi
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Owned!

Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
kcg5
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who wants four fried chickens and a coke
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Yawn
Nobody expects the spanish inquisition!!!!!



"History will be kind to me, as I intend to write it"- Sir Winston Churchill
Pakar Ilusi
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Oh come on, that was hilarious!! Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
Destiny
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I'm always pleased to see lawyers maligned but must admit I'm with kcg5.
A joke must be believable to be funny.
Contrived just doesn't do it.

Destiny
Josh Chaikin
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Apart from it being contrived, you have to understand that there is a reason why attorneys shouldn't ask questions they don't know the answer to. That, and depositions are held and there's little deviation from them typically. Smile

Sorry to take the fun out of it Smile
kcg5
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And my mother is a lawyer, a good kind of lawyer. SOOOO many stupid jokes... Some of them actually have the publics interest at heart, whereas some are all about the money-same could be said of many professions.


If it were up to me, all lawyer jokes could be adapted to republican presidents.
Nobody expects the spanish inquisition!!!!!



"History will be kind to me, as I intend to write it"- Sir Winston Churchill
ClintonMagus
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Quote:
On 2009-05-11 14:31, kcg5 wrote:
If it were up to me, all lawyer jokes could be adapted to republican presidents.


And ALL Democrats, regardless of what they do! Smile
Things are more like they are today than they've ever been before...
Gilgamesh_The_Librarian
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Oh Lord now we are into politics !!!

From the latin : Poly ( Meaning many) and Tics (Meaning blood sucking parasite)
critter
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I disagree. I think surrealism can be a great context for a joke.
Example, "I was trying to train my new hunting dog, but he couldn't figure out how to cock the shotgun."
See, this applies because lawyers don't have a saddle joint either. At least, that's what my politician uncle told me.


Quote:
On 2009-05-11 01:18, plasticdestiny wrote:
A joke must be believable to be funny.
Destiny
"The fool is one who doesn't know what you have just found out."
~Will Rogers
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