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Dragona Regular user New Jersey 159 Posts |
My girlfriend is trying to tell me to quit magic. Magic is something I enjoy doing and don't want to give up. On the other hand, there is a girl that I am interested at work and seems interested by the fact that I do magic. How exactly can I get this other girl to notice me and what shoul I do about my girlfriend?
I have the breath of dragons and the soul of a human.
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vinsmagic Eternal Order sleeping with the fishes... 10957 Posts |
Dragona that's a easy question.Why give up someting you love just because another person wants you to.
Dump the girl friend and start a relationship with the one on the backburner that likes magic vinny |
Jordan Piper Veteran user British Columbia, Canada 309 Posts |
If you're girlfriend really cares about you she wouldn't ask you to give up something you enjoy so much. What is her reasoning for wanting you to give up magic?
If you have feelings for this girl at work you should just come out and tell her or, and trust me on this, it may be something you regret for the rest of your life. |
Jordan Piper Veteran user British Columbia, Canada 309 Posts |
Hey while were on the subject I need some advice as well. I met this girl in college who I had a huge crush on. I couldn't work up the nerve to ask her out plus I think she might have a boy friend already. College has since ended and she has moved back home, which is over 6 hours from where I live. Should I e-mail her to tell her how I fell and risk making our friendship awkward or should I just try and forget about my feelings for her?
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Mya Angel Special Assistant California 1396 Posts |
Dragona, Let's be fair here... Is it really the magic she objects too or the "magic" you like to perform, ie... fire eating, geek magic, glass eating, hammering a nail up your nose, etc... perhaps it's because she really cares about you and just doesn't want you to get hurt?
There is nothing that remains so constant as change. Don't end up like concrete, all mixed up and permanently set.
He who slings mud will surely lose ground. |
Cheshire Cat Special user Wilmslow, UK 941 Posts |
My girlfriend, who is now my wife of 23 years, accepted the fact that I was a musician at the time. That I would be out till 2 or 3 in the morning working, and that I would be eccentric, moody and disorganised as musicians usually are. She had no idea that I would change and become business and financially organised and a wealth seeker! This is the kinda girl to have - believe me, and not someone who is trying 'choose your socks for you' and pin you to the wall already!! Why not pick one of her hobbies or interests and say you don't like that, and see what her reaction is? - and Kernel, yes, e-mail her or she'll never go out of your mind even when you are 85!! Never, ever, leave any unfinished business in this respect - as it sticks to your mind like superglue. Yes, she might have a boyfriend, so what! She might also have a crush on this guy she was too shy to tell, and now lives 6 hours away!
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Gambit New user Reading, UK 53 Posts |
Well,
thekernel - you may as well email her and tell her your feelings, but it might be better to handwrite her a letter?... and Dragona - by the fact that you want another girl to notice you, probably means than your relationship with your current girlfriend isn't really worth continuing... especially since she doesn't like magic! |
Dragona Regular user New Jersey 159 Posts |
Quote:
On 2003-05-29 03:20, Mya Angel wrote: I know that she wouldn't go for that, so she doesn't know about those things. The big thing is that she doesn't like how we go someplace with her friends and I show them a few things. She always gets ***** when I do that.
I have the breath of dragons and the soul of a human.
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Jason Wethington Special user Orlando, Fl 615 Posts |
My question is "Do you go out in a social setting and just start performing"? If you answer yes maybe try not doing it once or now that they know you perform magic why not wait until they ask you to. My girlfriend whom I live with, hates magicians and doesn't really care much for magic but loves watching me perform for other people. She loves the looks on peoples faces, and she knows I love to perform. She would never ask me to stop. In fact recently I made the comment about possibly dropping out of magic all together, she told me I was nuts that I loved it too much and I would never be able to do it. I hope someday she will be my wife .
I think your current girlfriend may feel like you have to be the center of attention or maybe she would just like to hang out with her friends without having entertainment. Pick your moments if you are going to stay with her. Otherwise see what is out there, like others have said you may regret it if you don't! Jason |
Dennis Michael Inner circle Southern, NJ 5821 Posts |
Dragona,
Life is a series of give and takes, what would she be willing to give up in return, equal in personal value? If she has something she is willing to give up it is NOT equal in value. Any woman who mades these kind of demands now, will make bigger one's later. This is not communicating, it is controlling, you will live to reget it and resent her for that demand. Now there is another who colud be a "box jumper" and make you a famous illusionist, well look over your options. Is the girl really a friend or are you willing to be a ventriloquist puppet with strings to pull? No one has the right to tell another what to do. Living with, Loving and Accepting the chosen partner (with all the quirks) can make life so much easier, and that does make sense. thekernel, LDRs are a strain on the individuals. (LDR= Long Distant Relationships) You're young and now is the best time of your life, enjoy it to the fullest before settling down. Remember the story of "the golden house" or the phrase "the grass is greener on the other side" Choose locally, however, don't pay attention to what I'm saying because I'm from NJ and my 22 year old son has a heartthrob in Tenn. and my 23 year old daughter has her heartthrob in Conn. Both more than 6-hours away. Neither have rings on their fingers, and they still do enjoy going out, but their "true love" is far-far away. What's that saying? "When the cats away the mouse will...??"
Dennis Michael
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Reg Rozee Special user Vancouver, Canada 592 Posts |
I can give you one piece of advice about this situation— one woman at a time! I've learned this lesson the hard way, boy have I ever. Unless you are just casually dating, of course, neither one will understand and you'll end up losing both. I mean whether they know about each other or not, it makes no difference. Plus your life will be full of stress until it all blows up on you, and it always does.
In the long run you will find it is really only worth putting time and effort into a relationship where you can be completely yourself with the other person, and those traits/hobbies/passions etc. are what they like about you. Be completely honest with people right up front and you won't find yourself in as many "dead-ends" when an issue like this comes up, and the relationships you do have will be a lot more fulfilling. -Reg {*}
Reality is what doesn't go away when you stop believing in it. -Phillip K. Dick
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes? -Chico Marx |
wassabi_87 Loyal user moscow, idaho 226 Posts |
don't try to go out with two at once, it still gives me the shivers
bike during the day,
do magic at night, and very early the next morning, homework. |
hkwiles Special user Howard Wiles 797 Posts |
All you ned to know about women...
Make 'em laugh. Howard |
Josh the Superfluous Inner circle The man of 1881 Posts |
Dump the uncompromising girl that doesn't care about your happiness. Don't even flirt till you do.
-Josh
What do you want in a site? "Honesty, integrity and decency." -Mike Doogan
"I hate it, I hate my ironic lovechild. I didn't even have anything to do with it" Josh #2 |
Mya Angel Special Assistant California 1396 Posts |
Well then, sounds like the guys are right, try out the new girl. Besides you're to young to settle for just one right now, play the field and have some fun first. Chances are neither one is "THE" girl yet.
There is nothing that remains so constant as change. Don't end up like concrete, all mixed up and permanently set.
He who slings mud will surely lose ground. |
Jonathan Townsend Eternal Order Ossining, NY 27297 Posts |
You might find out what speciffically your current girlfriend likes and dislikes about your magic hobby. It might be that she has no interst in it, or she may be indifferent to the subject and be expressing something about the attention you give your hobby, or perhaps that you seem to be using the hobby as a distraction from other things.
My hobbies are my own. Comic books and philosphy. Magic is just one of my hobbies. These I do not share, instead I am happy to be let alone. Likewise I have little interst in yoga, radio controlled airplanes YET I do know someone to whom these are important... their hobbies. Being with someone means working to respect the space they need to be happy. That is if you like them and want to be around them... do you?
...to all the coins I've dropped here
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Margarette Special user Memphis area 956 Posts |
Here's my two cents.....magic wasn't the reason, but I divorced a man who forced me to give up magic for quite a few years. Ultimately, YOU are the one that has to be happy with the decisions you make in life.
Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
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Dragona Regular user New Jersey 159 Posts |
Yeah, she broke up with me and said that she never wants to see me again. She aint nothing but a .... nevermind.
I have the breath of dragons and the soul of a human.
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