You're banned for your insensitivity to the killing of weasels and promoting it through song, "Pop Goes the Weasel!".

You're banned because the song title was a poor translation from the German, "Schnaaps for the Beagles!"

You're banned for thinking I am going to lead a group of children singing:

All around the mulberry bush,
The monkey chased the weasel.
The monkey stopped to pull up his sock,
Schnaaps for the Beagles!

Your banned for that terrible singing.

You're banned for hurting his feelings.

You're banned because I would rather have my feelings hurt than being accosted and having my jewels smashed.

You're banned because it looks like the Smashed Jewels clothing boutique is closed:

https://plus.google.com/105111643424581810031

You're banned for not suggesting we open an alternative boutique with them, "The Rising Appendage".

You're banned for not thinking of the title: "The Unusual Members."

You're banned for calling members of the Café "unusual".

You're banned because I was referring to a different kind of member.

You're banned because that member is not unusual, belonging to approximately 50 % of the human population.

You're banned because by "unusual" I meant to imply the size of it.

You're banned for pussyfooting around smashed jewels, rising appendages, and unusual members while secretly promoting the idea that size matters.

You're banned because there's nothing secret about it.

You're banned for bragging about a quality in which every slave is your equal and every !@#$%^& your superior.

I'm banning myself for not realizing you can't use a common term for a donkey on The Magic Café.

You're banned for insinuating that I sit on a donkey all day.

You're banned for not realizing that somehow the British spelling of arse is allowed.

You're banned for making me feel like an arse.