You're banned because Uncle Gravity never seems to get a mention.

You're banned because he just got mentioned.

You're banned for the aforementioned.

You're banned for whatever is said next.

You're banned because I just said it.

You're banned for being placed in the unfortunate position of being next in the post prior to yours.

You're banned for seeing the glass half empty.

You're banned because it's ALL empty; I drank it all.

You're banned because you drank it all.

You're banned for wanting me to not drink it and let it go to waste.

You're drunk for getting wasted on half a glass.

... and of course banned!... (why no 'edit' icon this time?!)

You're banned for not realising there is a time limit to the editing function.

You're banned for pointing that out.

You're banned for not realising that I was just answering his question.

You're banned for not realizing that I did realize and was just merely picking the obvious ban.

You're all banned for not banning Horatio for calling me a drunk, not to mention that he left a ban out of his first post, and then making the second one, indicating that perhaps HE was the one who was drunk.

You're banned for banning while having a hangover.

You're banned for the same reason you should have banned Horatio.

You're banned for rehashing your bans.