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jonesc2ii Loyal user Oxford, England 235 Posts |
My mother-in-law is so worried about being made to look a fool (especially by me I suspect) she refuses to follow instructions and just ruins everything I try to do, even when she hasn't been invited to participate.
No doubt there's one in every audience but I'm so bored of it I'm seriously considering quitting! I genuinely love the enjoyment I, and the audience, get when everyone's enjoying it. But when this happens I just feel like throwing in the towel. Any thoughts?
www.ixyl.co.uk/forums - for when you fancy a debate or a quiet chat.
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Frank Tougas Inner circle Minneapolis, MN 1712 Posts |
If I suspect anyone in a group doesn't like magic and is openly opposed to my performing, I simply don't do magic for them. I have been doing magic for over 30 years, done a lot of paid shows, etc. Yet my brother-in-law, who is a great guy, just can't have magic. He will do what you say your mother-in-law does. As nice as he is and as many years as I have been entertaining people with my magic, he has not seen me perform a trick in the past 20 years. You know what? That's okay with me.
Frank Tougas The Twin Cities Most "Kid Experienced" Children's Performer :"Creating Positive Memories...One Smile at a Time"
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irossall Special user Snohomish, Washington 529 Posts |
Your problem with your Mother-In-Law is a bit vague. Not understanding the true nature of the situation all I can say is, maybe you are using too many effects that require the help of an audience member. It is my opinion that too many effects in a show that requires audience involvement, only aids in slowing down the pace of a show and could possibly tire an audience before the end of the show. If your Mother-In-Law is interrupting the show, a conversation with her before or after the show is in order. I would just politely explain to her that others are enjoying the show and that the "theme" of the show is to entertain, not to make anyone look foolish, FUN is what Magic is all about. Ask her to be a good sport and she just may find that she too will have a great time and will even look forward to your next show. Maybe you could teach her a trick or two that she may enjoy showing to her friends. Sorry I don't have much to say that could be of help, I have never run into this type of situation.
Magically Yours Iven
Give the gift of Life, Be an Organ Donor.
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jonesc2ii Loyal user Oxford, England 235 Posts |
Thanks Frank,
it would be fine by me too, except we share a house with my m-i-l! This is a 7-bedroom-17th century-farmhouse that my kids love! Admittedly I love it here too! But it makes it difficult to perform in 'my house' for anybody without her being there and wrecking it! I'm sure you're spot on and that I can keep the practice sessions to the bedrooms or the occasions when she's not here. But isn't it weird that some people behave like that? I have a tendency to think that most people enjoy magic, am I being naive? Why would anybody choose to NOT enjoy an evening of magic? irossall, this is just when I'm toying with a new idea or presenting a new effect to my wife and kids and maybe a stray friend! I probably just need to learn to forget it when she's around but I find that a bit sad.
www.ixyl.co.uk/forums - for when you fancy a debate or a quiet chat.
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wayman Special user England - Sunderland 589 Posts |
I know it might not be in order but there is a cool thread on the Café that you may find interesting.
Its about sucker tricks, that is tricks for the know it all, or for people being difficult. Or how about a Story trick (once upon a time springs to mind), so that she has to listen while you tell the story. |
marko Inner circle 2109 Posts |
Firstly, yes jonesc2ii, some people just do not enjoy magic. At all. But how can you blame them? There's a lot of bad magicians out there. Unless you think you can convert her, my best, and unfortunately only, advice is to avoid performing for her.
Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
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blindbo Special user Bucks County, PA 790 Posts |
I happen to like my mother-in-law, I'll assume you do, too (yours, not mine...).
So, if I was in that situation, I might try and include her on the 'inside' of a trick, or two. That is, as a stooge, or confederate (of course, I wouldn't title it that way!). There are some great tricks you can do when you have an accomplice. My thought is, once on the inside, she may warm up to what magic is all about and be a better spectator for it. What do you think? |
landmark Inner circle within a triangle 5194 Posts |
I think it was either on this forum or maybe on Genii where someone pointed out that the way many magicians present magic is "The Spectator is Always Wrong." Think about it--where did the card go--the spec says here, you say, no it's there. What was the card, an Ace, no wrong, it's a king. And so on. Many people find this threatening. Their past experience with magic has been that they'll be made to look wrong and therefore foolish. So, it would help to change one's approach to "The spectator is always right."
What is that card--an Ace? Right, now let's blow on it, wow, now it's a king! See now you're making the spec as powerful as you--it's no longer a matter of one upmanship of proving who's smarter/more powerful. Hope this helps, landmark
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Jemy Regular user 128 Posts |
I have some friends(2) who just can't stand magic, I can't understand why, well I just don't do magic for them, it's really hard but well it's their right not to want to see magic.
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jonesc2ii Loyal user Oxford, England 235 Posts |
Thanks for the thoughts guys. I will try to find a "spectator is always right" way of doing things. And I will consider including her as an accomplice, though I'm sure she will be reluctant. Hmm, maybe I'll get her to do some mind reading.
www.ixyl.co.uk/forums - for when you fancy a debate or a quiet chat.
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Sean Loyal user No Cal 205 Posts |
Interestingly, when I started with magic again, my wife was definitely in the "I don't like magic," camp. However, as my skill has risen and I've talked to her about magic and I've made her watch magic (TV and live) she's starting to soften her stance. She still won't watch big illusion shows, but close-up and comedy magic is starting to get a thumbs-up. That makes me happy.
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blindbo Special user Bucks County, PA 790 Posts |
Quote:
On 2003-07-31 08:45, jonesc2ii wrote: Mind reading is a GREAT venue for getting her involved. On a less serious note, maybe you could convince her to assist you in the virgin test of your home-made illusion...sawing a woman in half...... |
Attilio Regular user Toronto Canada 136 Posts |
Hi jonesc2ii,
I like landmark's approach, try to get her on your side, its a very smart move.... just to expand on that a little bit. when presenting for people who don't enjoy being involved in the act, try presenting effects such as Triumph or color monte. tricks where your patter would go along the lines of "let me show you what happened to me the other day" or "i want to tell you about one of the most challenging situations i've ever faced performing magic" sometimes taking the focus off the spectator and placing it on yourself, can work out perfectly! Attilio |
Bill Palmer Eternal Order Only Jonathan Townsend has more than 24312 Posts |
One of the things that needs to happen is for you to try to entertain your mother in law rather than to fool her.
A problem some magicians have is that they feel that their job is to make the audience feel foolish, rather than to entertain them. I used to do a number of "sucker" tricks, and I learned eventually that they really get in the way. I started changing my presentations so that instead of using lines such as "Which shell do you think the pea is under?" I would say. "Now most people would say that the pea is under the shell in the middle, but it is actually over here on the right." Also avoid any items that require a response from your mother in law. ;-)
"The Swatter"
Founder of CODBAMMC My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups." www.cupsandballsmuseum.com |
Aus Special user Australia 996 Posts |
Marko
I agree that bad magicians are one of the reasons some people don’t like magic, but there are those few that seem to be determined that your guilty until proven innocent for no fault of your own. Sometimes it just has to do a lot with the people’s character. Magically Aus |
GlenD Inner circle LosAngeles, Ca 1293 Posts |
I think trying for the "conversion" method may be your best option at this point. I assume just ignoring her doesn’t work?
I feel for you. I have a sweet grandmother that i visit now and then. There is other family there quite often too. She has a lot of grown up kids and grandchildren and they come visit her a lot. Some from out of state. I am usually asked to do some magic when I show up. Everyone so far has really enjoyed the stuff i do but my grandmother always is mouthing off the method (at least the way she thinks it is being done). She enjoys it but just thinks she knows how everything is done. Sometimes i prove her wrong, other times i just don't reply and carry on. We all have a good time though and the situation is different from yours it seems. I have included her in on one of the effects and it went over very well. She was like a giddy kid, it was great. Anyways i am going over tonight to visit and do some magic. I have a cousin and her family visiting from Texas and they can't wait to see my magic. Will see how it goes. It is always fun to perform, even if for free! GlenD
"A miracle is something that seems impossible but happens anyway" - Griffin
"Any future where you succeed, is one where you tell the truth." - Griffin (Griffin rocks!) |
BlakeBlair Regular user Sunny So. California 111 Posts |
If All Else Fails.... you can ask her to Help with these Grand Illusions...
Sawing a MIL in Half.... Disappearing MIL in Cabinet.... Bullet Catch anyone!! If you or She Enjoys escapology... may be have her escape from a strait jacket & Handcuffs.. ungimmicked of course.. . OK all the Kidding aside. I know totally what you mean as I have a MIL that does the same thing, the only difference is she only stay for 2 week visits. Good Luck !! Bb ok for all you people that got offended with this post.. It Was Posted as HUMOR!! I wish No Harm to my or anyone else MIL!
FuFanu.. Two Cards Torn & Restored...
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