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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » New to magic? » » Seeking a Critique After a Decade of Not Performing (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

Jonathan Hawley-Peters
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It's like being new to magic all over again! Fortunately, that means it's really exciting for me.
Right now, I would like some outside opinions on my performance ability, so I made this video:
http://youtu.be/f0uCovhPwEE
It's set so you can only see it if you have that link, because I don't think the general public should see.
Any feedback will be greatly appreciated!
Website: jhpmagic.com
professorwhut
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Not bad overall.
I prefer to refer to silks as handkerchiefs, or hankies, not silks. Only magicians use that term. This is a pet peeve of mine. Although some do not have a problem with it.
Your black egg bag is hard to see against your black shirt.
Too much fumbling behind your table, this is distracting.

Your routining was good, things flowed nicely. You put some thought into it.
You have a good stage presence.

It takes guts to post videos, I commend you for that.
After much soul searching about a signature, I decided not to have one.

TG Pop [aka ProfessorWhut]
Dougini
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Quote:
On 2012-07-28 11:10, professorwhut wrote:
...Your black egg bag is hard to see against your black shirt.
Too much fumbling behind your table, this is distracting.

Your routining was good, things flowed nicely. You put some thought into it.
You have a good stage presence.

It takes guts to post videos, I commend you for that.


I agree with the Professor. The silk in change bag took way too long, though. Ya need to edit that quite a bit. It was a half hour long. You could cut that in half, or even down to 20 minutes. One thing I have learned, is to have one routine segue into the next, seamlessly. Stopping to put stuff away and get other stuff out...that just bogs it down.

Ya know, I'd stay away from the color black. So much gets lost...in fact, it can be misunderstood to be hiding something...just a thought.

You do have a good stage presence. You smile a lot, and that is important. Ya know, just a bit of editing and polishing, I see NO problem! You do have guts. I won't do a YouTube performance. That's just me, though.

Doug
Jonathan Hawley-Peters
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Thank you very much Tracy and Doug!

This is the list I'm taking away: wear white or light shirt (or use props that are always visible by contrast), work to create smooth transitions, and speak using the audience's vocabulary and with an understanding of their point of view.

Doug: The intention with the silk routine was to perform it as I would for a group of 8 year olds. I would definitely speed that routine up if a real crowd was not enjoying it. I understand that it probably bored you to death. Sorry.
Website: jhpmagic.com
djurmann
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This is on the first 10 minutes: Bear in mind I am not a hugely experienced magical performer and do not do kids magic.

Overall I liked it but.....

I think Mnemonic is not a word 8 year olds will understand. OK they will get the idea but how about "to help me remember"?

When you use Jeremy to remind you of the green ball are you expecting the kids to call out?

When you did the silk to egg and took the role of the kid that seems odd if you have a room full of kids. If you are planning to use a kid I think you are optimistic if you expect them to stick with your script.

Consider bringing in a word that the kids can chant to make the magic work. Also include them in the counting. "all together 1, 2, 3....ALAKAZAM!"....hmmmm didn't work, maybe if we do it louder.

Didn't see it in the piece I watched (I may do the rest later) but do you have any give aways planned? Is the birthday boy or girl going to be the star and get lots of goodies (may help with future bookings from the other kid's parents).

Anyway what do I know but just a few thoughts. Basically though I liked it, especially the beginning.

Danny
Dougini
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Quote:
On 2012-07-29 03:06, Jonathan Hawley-Peters wrote:
Doug: The intention with the silk routine was to perform it as I would for a group of 8 year olds. I would definitely speed that routine up if a real crowd was not enjoying it. I understand that it probably bored you to death. Sorry.


No, Jonathan...I wasn't bored to death! LOL! Ha! Just looking for ways for you to improve an act I consider to be a pretty good performance for a guy who's been out of magic for so long. I've been in the radio industry all my life, and "editing" is a way of life! I find myself editing myself every day!

Dead space in radio is a cardinal sin! So I notice it a lot, that's all. Keep performing! Polish it! I kinda envy you...

Doug
Andy Young
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I will give you my humble opinion. The beginning I think went fine, but I think that if you aren't going to use the Stratosphere for any real effect except for the bag then I wouldn't use it. Also you covered the tube the first to times, but when the magic happens it is left open. I would consider using magic words that kids may know. You could pretend to have forgotten you magic words. Also if at all possible produce items that you can use after your beginning effect that way you can use it and then put the items away as you go. I am big on maximizing your items to create a flow and really think of the reason for having something. The part with the wand works, but I wouldn't ask where you put the wand if it is in a bag. I would just introduce the wand by saying I know I put it in the red bag. Also if you have your wand before the changing silk that part would flow better. Just like the other comments I would also like to say that a shirt that isn't black would help with the effect, but otherwise I thought that was nicely done. The multiplying bottles went well just work on your patter and the clean up was quite quick. The last thing I would say is that if you are doing the candy production I wouldn't have the kid mess it up the first two times. Let them produce the candy the first time and maybe put another kicker after the candy. I think that the farther you went the smoother it became. To be truly entertaining you need to really think about your flow and always have a purpose for your actions.Hopefully that helps.
satellite23
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Here's my thoughts:

First of all, kid ARE a real audience, and will be more honest with you than adults would. If they don't something they will let you know! On the contrast, if they love something, you'll hear a lot of yelling and laughter.

Second, I honestly think 29 minutes for a YouTube video is too long. Generally, people wathc YouTube videos while they are bored. They are sitting at a computer searching for something to do. Generally, people judge the first minute of a video and decide whether or not to watch more of it based on that judgement.

Either way, only REALLY awesome videos encourage a lot of people to watch over more than a few minutes.

Now, I'm not saying that you are bad at performing. In fact, quite the contrary. You have good presence and a varied routine.

I think you should have broken down that video into different segments and then uploaded them as separate videos. Not only does that look better (time-wise) to the viewer, but if they like it they will automatically go onto the next segment, maybe look at your channel more and subscribe.

Just some thoughts, best of luck!
Mr. Mystoffelees
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I agree with satellite23- I tried to watch, but just could not devote the time to see it all. Glad you are back performing, it looks like you enjoy it and have a nice style of delivery. One thing I do with kid shows is get down on their level. I bring a low chair and table, and sometimes even a rug to sit on. Just a thought...

Jim
Also known, when doing rope magic, as "Cordini"
Jonathan Hawley-Peters
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Wow, this is a lot more of a response than I was expecting. Everybody is so warm and welcoming. The advice is extremely helpful. Thanks everybody.

Off to work on scripting my transitions. While wearing a white shirt Smile

PS: You guys are awesome!
Website: jhpmagic.com
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