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S2000magician Inner circle Yorba Linda, CA 3465 Posts |
Most travelers have at one time or another had a bad experience with security or customs at airports; we needn't bore each other with those.
But what about the other end of the spectrum? What's your best (most enjoyable, funniest, whatever) experience? Mine came a few years ago when my wife accompanied me to Paris where I was to review a CFA Level III mock exam. We arrived at de Gaulle airport for our return flight; you have to talk to airport security before you queue up for the ticket counter to get your boarding pass and check your luggage. My wife always tells me not to joke with the security or customs people, but I've never had a problem when having done so. The gentleman asked for our passports, skimmed them quickly, then asked me, "You were born in the US?" "Well," I replied, "that's what my parents tell me. I was quite young at the time and don't remember." He burst out laughing. "That's the best answer I've ever heard!" And off to ticket counter we went, with an enthusiastic "Bon voyage!" from the security guard. |
tommy Eternal Order Devil's Island 16544 Posts |
If there is a single truth about Magic, it is that nothing on earth so efficiently evades it.
Tommy |
imgic Inner circle Moved back to Midwest to see 1336 Posts |
Recently I went back home to Wisconsin and passed through General Mitchell Airport in Milwaukee. Got a smile after getting through security and saw...
"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
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George Ledo Magic Café Columnist SF Bay Area 3042 Posts |
I love it!!!!!
I think my "best" experience was in Dubai, where I flunked the metal detector test. A member of the Dubai Police called me over, asked me to raise my arms, patted me down quickly but thoroughly, and told me to go on. He came across like he was just doing his job, not treating me like a terrorist, and not even looking for something hidden. The funniest one was many years ago when I was in the Army, in my khaki uniform, dripping with metal. The metal detector kept ringing. I thought I was going to have to strip, but they finally took pity on this kid and let me through.
That's our departed buddy Burt, aka The Great Burtini, doing his famous Cups and Mice routine
www.georgefledo.net Latest column: "Sorry about the photos in my posts here" |
arthur stead Inner circle When I played soccer, I hit 1773 Posts |
OK, get ready: From 1982 thru '83 I toured as Musical Director and keyboardist of the Mamas and the Papas. This line-up included original members John Phillips and Denny Doherty, with John's daughter Mackenzie Phillips (from the TV show One Day ay a Time) replacing Michelle, and Spanky MacFarlane (from Spanky and our Gang) replacing the late Mama Cass.
In those days, John Phillips and I were drinking buddies and often got into a lot of trouble together. John always traveled with a leather carry-on satchel full of risqué toys. Among other things, the contents included Taffy, his blow-up doll. One of John's fantasies was to get searched at an airport, and have the TSA officers discover his bag of toys. One day his dream came true! Our band was waiting to board a flight at a smallish airport somewhere in the mid-west. Just prior to boarding, I was busy buying a magazine in the airport bookstore, when I heard John yelling at the top of his voice: "Arthur! It's going down now!" I ran to the check-in area, and sure enough, there was John, being confronted by a female security officer. She had zipped open his satchel, and found herself staring right at Taffy's wide open mouth! Embarrassed and confused, she nevertheless insisted on searching further, and digging her hand deeper into John's bag, she pulled out a huge vibrator! John was ecstatic! Blushing profusely, the female officer waved him through security without another word. |
Dannydoyle Eternal Order 21219 Posts |
I go through customs a LOT.
The following is funnier if you know (Probably like Bill does.) I do not walk around with cards and stuff to just show people spur of the moment. I do not perform outside the context of my show. Just not my style. So I am leaving the Dominican Republic. (Yea you can tell already it is funny.) Literally customs is a grass shack. So I have had a rough couple months putting in a new show (Not mine, one we produced.) and FINALLY I am leaving the island. I have my headphones on and can hear nothing but that. My contact at the resorts comes over to me and says "hey dumb @@@ they are calling your name over the PA." So I go to answer the page. They have a question about my checked bag at customs and the flight is about to take off! So I go with them pretty well knowing what is about to happen. In my checked bag is a giant nut, sponge bunnies, bricks of cards, and so forth. Trying to explain to them in a language we really don't share was HILARIOUS. I ended up having to do magic for the guys with all the big guns. Then they call in other people. Funny part was I didn't know WHY they were being called in. Did I do something wrong or something right? Turns out they just wanted everyone, and I mean EVERYONE to see. So now the plane is waiting while I am doing a show for these guys. So 2 years later I am back in the DR again. Left the nut at home thinking ahead. My wife got stopped on the way INTO the DR. Turns out someone with her name is going to be arrested the second she tries to get into the Dominican Republic. Glad it wasn't her. So we are LEAVING and we have no idea what happened with this other woman. But we packed my stuff and she even said she would pack the show in my bag. Well one brick of cards was in HER bag. SO they call her name and she sort of figures out why, BUT we wonder about the whole woman with the same name thing. My wife is from Spain so she SPEAKS the language, but if they are looking to arrest her that may or may not be of help. But then again if they are looking to arrest her they would probably have a more aggressive strategy than calling her to the counter at customer service. So once again I end up doing a show for customs. It was much funnier than upsetting. I have been VERY fortunate with flying, luggage, and bad experiences with the TSA and others. I have an artificial shoulder so I beep going through a lot. It is what it is. I don't carry much at all with me. So I fly more than most people and really have no bad stories.
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus <BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell |
imgic Inner circle Moved back to Midwest to see 1336 Posts |
Not quite Airport Security in the common sense...but when I was going through training on the AWACS radar plane in the Air Force I was at Tinker Air Force Base outside of Oklahoma City. We'd just finished a mission, gotten off the plane, and we're waiting for the crew van to pick us up from the flight-line. As we stood watching the other planes landing, our co-pilot noticed one taxiing that was showing an "indication of duress" (a setting that was visible from the ground that indicated the plane was being hijacked and pilots unable to talk on the radio.) The co-pilot informed the Security Police near our plane who radio'ed it in. The dispatched an Emergency Response Team and as the plane parked, the made the entire crew get out and go face down on the tarmac. Our co-pilot was chuckling the whole time as he knew the pilot of the other aircraft was new and had a habit of forgetting to correct the settings. The 20+ folks of the other plane had to lay there for quite some time until things got cleared up...
"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
Flying back from Paris, I was stopped at airport security and suddenly surrounded by LOTS of official-looking people. They had screened my magic bag and inside was a jumbo coin and a purse frame lying atop in a position that quite resembled a hand grenade on the screen. It didn't take them too long to figure it out, although there were a number of questions. How is this a good experience? The fact that I am not still there is good enough for me.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
Starrpower Inner circle 4070 Posts |
As some of you know I am an experienced traveler; I fly an average of 4 segments each week. I have TSA PreCheck and my best experience is when I sail through in 30 seconds or less! In other words, no experience is the best experience. Hard to believe but with all that flying I don't have a single funny story to tell. Milwaukee is my home base airport and the Recombobulation sign is a classic (it is not an actual word, BTW).
Arthur, you have the best stories! I really wanna sit down and have a drink with you one day! |
arthur stead Inner circle When I played soccer, I hit 1773 Posts |
Quote:
On Jun 15, 2015, Starrpower wrote: Starrpower, as I told Slowkneenuh on another thread: Having lived the rock 'n' roll lifestyle to the fullest, some of my touring experiences are so outrageous that most people would not believe them! |
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