Hi all

I'm not a regular here but do occasionally pop in and make a comment or two. The main reason I don't some back regularly is the constant abuse and criticism from a couple of members. These people attack anyone who questions their views and stamp on anyone who's not to 'their level'. It has made this forum unbearable for many. There are 2 obvious culprits who seem to troll these boards. They claim to be all knowing yet fail to show any constructive commentary choosing instead to attack and criticise anyone who disagrees with their interpretation of the subject.

I cannot be the only one infuriated by their bully like tactics..

I don't doubt the wealth of knowledge these people may have to offer but I also believe their online presence is often poisonous - there's a good chance they will fail to appreciate my intent on posting this (making this forum of benefit to all) and show themselves all to clearly in their replies (which are clearly evident with only a cursory scan through these threads)

Just for transparency...

James Brown
professionalopportunist@gmail.com
Dorset UK
@profopportunist

James, I believe I have made a similar point in the past. I have clashed with some people here and later found out they were nice people. But if I hadn't stuck around I would not know that.

We can be judgemental and superior here, more than on other sections of the Café. I wish it were not so, because like you I feel it drives people away and stifles conversation.

Like you, for transparency, Tony Galvin.

I have clashed with Tony in the past. But I actually invited him (VERY seriously.) for a holiday dinner at my house. Actually it is any dinner and an open invite.

As he said he stayed here. Otherwise it wouldn't happen.

What you seek to do is bully people into acting in a way you think of as acceptable. Sorry. All people act as they wish and if you came in and interacted with everyone on a regular basis instead of dictating what you want to happen it would be easier.

That is how life works. You don't get what you want and get to dictate how people in a public forum act by starting a thread complaining. Get more involved with discussions.

Tony and I have different views on hypnosis. I respect his views as they come from experience. The real problem is having an opinion based on nothing but opinion. What you "think" the right answer is. To think such an opinion varies as much weight as decades of experience is silly. What is poisonous is dissemination of bad information by the uninformed.

Why would anyone even want bad information? What good will it do you?

James, you are the last of many that ran into the wolf pack.

Communication or attitude has nothing to do how nice people. Properly you are all nice, in another context. There is just a problem in the communication department.
I have read a lot of threads where the communication got sidetracked because of this pack. I myself, made a comment on a thread where the knowledge people, made statement based upon the fact that a magician was behind the screen and therefor it was crap. They had not seen the material that the where criticizing. Well that did not go all that well.

I will chime in here because my point was not about hypnosis, but alone on professionalism in making comment or replying to a thread. I have been a CEO for more than 25 years so this is something I know about and have seen more than once.

The communication is based on management by fear. It is an antiquated form of management and mostly used by the older generation. The main point is to dominate the other part. That gets the sensation of winning the discussion. What it does in reality is the opposite. If you use this form for communicating you will lose respect from the other part. The respect when lost is hard to regain. The part being dominated will eventually end the communication because common sense tells then it is pointless to go on. Another feeling of victory for the dominant. But nothing further from the truth that feeling is.

If you push the dominant part far enough with argument the eventually will seek to the next level. It is starting the child/parent conversation. They are the parent and the other part is the child. This is the point of no return. All communication is wasted after that.

The only way to stop this kind of communication is to be the manager. They will never admit having a problem, and it is all the other idiot, that are wrong.

The child/parent communication has root in many personal problems. One of the more common is lack of self-esteem. Not to be mistaken for self-confidence. I am not saying it is so because that would require a long conversation and evaluation. It could be a simple attitude of superiority. It could have been picked up in kinder garden and stayed on as a means of power full communication.

The postulation that to have an opinion in here you should have at least 20 years of working experience is arrogant and narrow minded. There are good performers and bad performers. There are great theoretic masterminds that have never performed. If you make any comments in here it is because you have some kind of knowledge on the field. The counter opinion should be more solid than “yea another idiot” or you will lose respect. At some point the respect from friends will diminish and if they are real friends the will tell you the reason.

Do you do tarot cards? Can I book you for a reading?

Yea it is always one side that is wrong. Oh and never one you agree with. Nice pop psycho babble, but off the mark. Like it or not all opinions ate not created equal. If I was to roll in after 2 years and tell you things that you know are wrong about being a CEO how would that conversation go exactly? If you and 4 of your 25 year CEO bodies were in a pub and someone with 3 yeasts under his belt, or better yet just read a few books about it starts telling you that your ideas are just wrong and you ate clueless and their way is THE NEW WAY? How would that be received? Be honest here they would be laughed out of the joint.

The idea that experience counts for nothing is Ludicrous. It is generally apposed by the inexperienced.

So Lets not play your silly card of "I've seen this a lot". Mainly because I have seen this, what you are attempting to do, a LOT. Heck when I had no experience I didn't try it. Why? Because I was more interested in LEARNING. Give it a try.

Too many "opinions" being bantered bout and not enough facts, in my opinion (lol). There is a difference. Maybe you come here for opinions, most I hear from come here for knowledge, experience and facts. Those that take away the most do so not with opinions but again, knowledge, experience and facts.

Wait now let him tell us how condescending we are being. That is the next step.

There are not always a wrong. More often there are ways of doing things. The new way could be interesting because ideas get formed based on knowledge from others. You all have learned the hard way or at least not as easy as the next generation. The trainee could be the one with the golden theory. You should stay open minded and debate the new way. If your mind is open you could get something out of it, and if not, you can make your point.

I would newer laugh at anyone, I would enlighten them. If the arguments are well founded it is not difficult. If the other part just have another idea of how the world spins then it is fine be me. I would respect the guy anyway and by him a beer. That is how to get respect.

And I would newer comment on anything a have not read or seen.

I am here for the knowledge and not for the retorik opinions.

No. Apparently you are here to tell others what to do. You think that gets you respect?

Not every theory has merit. Some things are just wrong. Experience can tell you this.

All the psycho babble in the world can not get around reality. Keep spinning it and keep telling others how to act. Apparently this is how you gain knowledge. Is that how you rose to be a CEO? When you were starting out telling the more experienced you want to learn from how to act?

Ooh, Danny now your getting off again. At no point have I told you how to act. I did tell you that your way of reacting is bad for respect. You are seeking respect not building it.

Keep an open mind, you could might learn something.

You hit the nail this time. I have told the seniority how things should be done, and they actually listened to me. That is called progress and renewal. Mentalisme and hypnosis could might gain from progress and innovation. That is not to say everything new is a gift but once in a while it is.

Yea I am sure you just walked in and started doing exactly what you're don't now. Hard to believe

Perhaps if you took your own advice YOU could learn something. Oh no wait you know everything already.

See I don't particularly care if you respect me. That is where your ego is getting in the way.

Point of no return. Bye Bye.

The point of no return was you breezing in here with no introduction and starting to dictate terms and give us a bunch of psycho babble.

God forbid you learn something. Nope you just want to preach at us and tell us how to act.

Here's the problem with your logic. If there was anything new, a breakthrough, new methods, advancements, etc. (which there have been over the years) they would not be revealed or introduced here. They are introduced, tested, revised and tweaked in the and run through the scrutiny of the actual hypnosis community, not a magic forum. Only once they are presented and well analyzed in the hypnosis community would they ever even begin to show up here.

The only things that get introduced or revealed here (as anyone who has been a member here for any length of time knows) is "hypnosis (or fake hypnosis) for magicians." This is the stuff that is almost ALWAYS quite suspect, sub-par, typically offered by someone with little or minimal real experience in actual hypnosis and yes, what many would deem wrong. The problem is many that wonder in here may not know or realize this. We often are creating the true reality and proper perspective. We also do not want some of the mentalities of magic to be brought into our industry.

As Danny said, there is absolutely, 100% no substitution for experience and reality. It can't be rushed, it can't be faked. You can bend or twist things all you want, it all comes down to this. This all begins with proper information, education and knowledge as the foundation. Not shortcuts, pretend, facimilies, faux or pseudo.

As far as what you said above, we most definitely have a different definition of "respect" for sure.

Which is also quite common with most newcomers here, yet they wonder why they get called out on their "opinions".

Point is spend the time to learn what is there, THEN try to change it. Until you have basics no I am not going to debate the "new". It is lazy.

A debate is between peers about a common knowledge. Not between a person with no knowledge or a person seeking knowledge.

You misrepresent the issue. Nobody just asks questions. They go to tell the people answering with decades of experience that they are wrong. So at that point you get what you get. Lets at least be honest about what you are crying about.

Wow, that escalated quickly!

Danny, the day will come when we break bread. I look forward to it. MP, I will be back to Edinburgh to annoy you within the year.

This can be an intimidating place, James is right on that. I won't say anything more in case I fan the flames!