I have avery large collection of jokes pranks and funny stories that I keep locked away in my head, and I thought this might be a good place to share one...

I once saw a magician is perfroming at a county fair. He had a crowd of young people sitting on the ground around his podium, and he was doing simple kid magic like hippity hop rabbits. At one point he held up a glass jar. Probably quart size. He made some cute patter and began to shake the empty jar. Suddenly he shook it down out of site under the podium and out of view. It was gone for about one second. When his hands came up the jar is now full of M&Ms. Unfortunatly, the shake he gave it coming out from under the table demonstrated his neglect of proper lid attachment. The M&Ms flew out over his shoulder and all over the ground. Some of them landed in a goat pen nearby. I am sure he meant to give the candy out to all the kids, but instead he made a lame joke about how it is nice to share with animals. We were all watching the goat eat the M&Ms.

Anybody else got a funny one to share?

I remember peforming for a nursing home years ago. Things were not going well. It was my first time performing for the elderly, and I wasn't getting the reactions I had hoped for. Towards the end of the show, I ignitd my cake pan. Fire, low celings, and sprinkles aren't the bes combination. The sprinkler went off, and the audience started getting very wet. I guess they thought it was part of the show, because they began applauding louder than they had for the whole show.

...perhaps they thought it was a new version of the Snowstorm? (Hey! Call it "Thunderstorm" and you could probably market the thing!)

My worst experience was on Halloween night when I was 16. After presenting the Sub Trunk in a revue as flawlessly as I could at that age, it was discovered that instead of dropping the keys on the stage as usual, I'd nervously tucked them into my vest pocket. (DOH!)

The worst part is that after the dramatic music ended and my Assistant finished freaking out, the M.C. announced "I think he's got the key in his pocket!" Talk about adding insult to inury.

Eventually, the Assistant raised the curtain over the trunk and I slipped the key out to her. Before emerging from the trunk, I mussed my hair, knocked my glasses askew, pulled my jacket half off and played the thing for comedy. It was the night I realized that a belly laugh is as good as applause any day.

My key is now attached to an 8-inch linking ring...visible, easy to find and WON'T fit in your pocket. <sigh>

Dan Wolfe, aka. "The Amazing EARL"

I once performed for my buddies in a dingy pool club. The owner, this superstitious (dontcha love these people?!) old chinese dude was watching the whole time, cursing and swearing in amazement as he watched.

After the whole show and I was about to leave he stopped me and asked me for 4 digits to win the lottery. I told him "I'm not sure if I should..."

he said, "Come on, just try."

So I said, "Ok, I can try"

He said, "Yes yes, use your heart!"

He said tapping on my chest with his pen eagerly awaiting to jot down any digit I spew out.

He held his left palm out as a surface to write on and his pen tip hovered anxiously above it.

I closed my eyes and tried my best not to smile as I said, "One..."

and he jot down a solid '1' on his palm.

"Two..no wait..yes...two..."

A huge 2 appeared on his palm.

"Three...."

A three appeared but only half way as he looked at my with "What?!" written on his face.

Then I smiled and said, "Four"

He threw his pen and cursed as he laughed along.

I don't believe in gambling and he knows that now

It was fun.

Take care guys,

Logan

Back in high school, my mentor and I went to a Halloween party held by some friends. We had each done some effects to great response. Being relatively dark, my mentor decided to do the Zombie to the music playing in the background.

About half way through the Zombie routine, one of the audience members made the comment "WOW! These guys are GOOD!"
My mentor answered with "Hey, they wouldn't hire just ANYONE to perform for you!"

At that particular moment, the ball dropped to the floor and rolled across the rug. Timing truly IS everything, for because of his comment, everyone thought it was done intentionally!