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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » The side walk shuffle » » What!? Wasn't it Funny? (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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TheAmbitiousCard
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Quote:
On 2004-09-20 13:29, Pete Biro wrote:
When an audience in a club can see one another the laughs are LESS, in darkness the laughs are MORE.


I had no idea. Interesting Pete.

This topic requires a 2-part answer on what to do:

1. There are some great one-liners to get you thru the moment that you can learn here at our luscious Café. However, most of my "what-to-say" comes from on-the-job experience doing shows (which may be why I just ain't all that funny Smile ).

2. The real work comes in later when you write down in your notebook that it didn't work and your hypotheses about why not and what to change (timing, body language, voice) for next time.
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JamesinLA
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I have it built into my show: educating the crowd to applaud. I've got the lines in the show and do them each time. Even if they do clap, there are always some who don't and I focus those lines on them to get them all started. Since Danny's post, I will now write some lines about educating them about laughing. I hadn't done that per se, except with lines to deal with them not laughing. Here's just one I do:

"That was like a joke... except jokes are funny."

Jim

Okay, it's not as great as BroDavid's, but it's something... (even if it's not a joke).
Oh, my friend we're older but no wiser, for in our hearts the dreams are still the same...
Pete Biro
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Some peformers are just not funny. The lines don't help.
STAY TOONED... @ www.pete-biro.com
Bill Palmer
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And conversely, some lines just aren't funny -- the performers don't help.

Seriously, sometimes the performer doesn't fit the joke.

Dick Cavett used to write for Groucho Marx. Groucho was not a joke-teller. But one morning, he called Dick up and asked him for a joke for a Friars' club thing he was working that night. So Dick gave him this one.

"A woman goes into her son's room one morning and says, 'Sonny, it's time to get up, you have to go to school.' "

"But Mom, I don't want to go to school. The kids call me names behind my back. They hate me. They make fun of my clothes. Why do I have to go to school?"

"Well, first of all, you're 37 years old, and second, you're the principal."

Groucho thought that was pretty funny. The next day, he called Cavett up and said, "That joke was awful. Nobody laughed."

"You told it wrong."

"No, I didn't. You know me better than that."

"Well tell it to me, just exactly the way you told it."

"Okay. This woman goes into her little boy's room one morning..."

Dick said, "That's the problem. You told it wrong. It's not funny if you say 'her little boy.' You have to say 'her son.' "

Groucho never quite got the difference.

And that's a big part of it. You have to really understand every word and nuance in the joke. Or it won't be funny.
"The Swatter"

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Tommy Johnson
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Once you bomb your joke, just say "And here is the akwardness of silence." Or sometimes jokes aren't for everyone and you can't always try to be something you're not.

Tommy Johnson
Lee Darrow
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"Just throw back the ones you like, folks!"

"Come on, guys, hlp me out! I grew up disadvantages - my father was a cartoonist, but it's too much of a pain to drag an easle and all those pens out here!"

"That one's a time release joke. Tomorrow you'll laugh and have no idea why."

When it falls flat, do a bad imitation of a trumpet playing "Taps." and put your hand over your heart.

"Nobody move! We have got to try to resussitate that gag!"

Move your hand back and forth making a sound like Dr. McCoy's Medical Tricorder. Look up and say, "It's dead, Jim. Dammit, I'm a magician, not a comedian..... obviously..."

Move your hand in a weird set of finger positions and repeat the first line of the joke very slowly. For some reason, this usually gets a laugh.

If a joke fails after they applauded something earlier in your set, look at the crowd with a frown and say, "How quickly you guys turn on a fella!"

Put your hand over your heart, stagger back a few steps and croak, "Medic!" Also works after a particularly bad pun where the audience groans...

Just some ideas for you all to play with...

Lee Darrow, C.H.
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<BR>"Because NICE Matters!"
The Mighty Fool
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Comedy is a bit like fighting. When you're duking it out with some guy, psychology plays a big role. When the guy lands a punch, no matter how much it hurts you, just shrug it off & laugh....that'll un-nerve him a bit. NEVER let on to your opponent that you're hurting/injured.

In comedy, or busking with comedy added in this case, it's not always a wise idea to have set jokes with climactic punchlines & pauses for laughter. To the heckler, that will be his cue NOT to laugh! Keep the patter smooth and flowing....the jokes should fit the same rhythm as the rest of the patter, and after the punch, just keep right on going as though you didn't expect anything. If the audience DOES burst into laughter, yes THEN go ahaead and wait for it to subside, but if they don't, it won't seem as though a set-up joke bombed...you just continue unfazed, and God-willing, no-one will be the wiser.
Everybody wants to beleive.....we just help them along.
Payne
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If your joke bombs, wait a beat, look out into the middle of the audience and say,

"I didn't realize I was playing in a red state."
"America's Foremost Satirical Magician" -- Jeff McBride.
irossall
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Quote:
On 2004-09-19 19:54, constantine wrote:
These are the jokes,folks.
Henny Youngman 1938


Love it Smile

Payne wrote:
If your joke bombs, wait a beat, look out into the middle of the audience and say,

"I didn't realize I was playing in a red state"

Shame Payne. You know that politics is taboo. Smile
Iven Smile
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cstreet_1986
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I thought it was great, just a shame that there isn't such a political following here in the UK.
cmwalden
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Quote:
On 2004-09-20 13:41, mandrake01 wrote:
Rip Torn;

"You're gonna think about these when you get home and LAUGH!"


I hate to drag this up after so long, but I think Rip Taylor will be happier knowing he was properly quoted. Rip Torn is Zed in Men in Black, among other things. Rip Taylor was a flamboyant who I mostly saw in the 70's who always threw confetti around.

(BTW: Doing a quick search on Taylor I found his web site. He is apparently going to appear on Will and Grace on Nov. 18th. How funny is that?)

cMw
"There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in our reality."

- William Shakespeare
Bill Palmer
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Rip Taylor is one of the funniest guys in the world. He is almost like Paul Lynd on steroids.
"The Swatter"

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My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups."

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ed rhodes
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Quote:
On 2004-11-17 01:15, cmwalden wrote:
Quote:
On 2004-09-20 13:41, mandrake01 wrote:
Rip Torn;

"You're gonna think about these when you get home and LAUGH!"


I hate to drag this up after so long, but I think Rip Taylor will be happier knowing he was properly quoted. Rip Torn is Zed in Men in Black, among other things. Rip Taylor was a flamboyant who I mostly saw in the 70's who always threw confetti around.

(BTW: Doing a quick search on Taylor I found his web site. He is apparently going to appear on Will and Grace on Nov. 18th. How funny is that?)

cMw


Y'know, you're right. And I should have gotten it right to begin with.

Robin Williams (I got that one right!) has an entire riff he does if the audience stops laughing. "So, this is what it's like in Comedy Hell! Come, look inside my mind and see what happens when a comedian bites the big one!" But of course, that only works for Robin!

Quote:
On 2004-11-18 22:24, Bill Palmer wrote:
Rip Taylor is one of the funniest guys in the world. He is almost like Paul Lynd on steroids.




Certainly unique! I remember him coming down from the audience, throwing the confetti everywhere and finally dumping the bag on some poor unfortunate's head! (If I could have just remembered his last name was TAYLOR and not TORN.)
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
cstreet_1986
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I have stolen this straight from watching Part Troll by Bill Bailey (UK Comedian):

"My first job was selling doors door-to-door. That's a tough job, isn't it?"

Chris
garyanimal
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So my jokes aren't funny. At least I've got a big knob.
ed rhodes
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Quote:
On 2004-09-19 13:58, Mario Morris wrote:
Do you have any examples?
May be your foot note will help
"The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives" Albert Einstein
"Think outside the box -- everyone else is too busy trying to think outside it" De'vo Vom Schattenreich
Mario


Shoudn't that be; "Think INSIDE the box -- everyone else is too busy trying t think outside it"?
"There's no time to lose," I heard her say.
"Catch your dreams before they slip away."
"Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you could lose your mind.
Ain't life unkind?"
Danny Hustle
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Quote:
On 2005-02-07 16:16, garyanimal wrote:
So my jokes aren't funny. At least I've got a big knob.


You can get a salve for that at the chemist Gary. Smile

Best,

Dan-
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"MT is one of the reasons we started this board! I’m so sick of posts being deleted without any reason given, and by unknown people at that." - Steve Brooks Sep 7, 2001 8:38pm
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Daniel Santos
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I recommend Harry Alan's Sleight of Mouth. My friend gave it to me as a gift and I love it! It has a bunch of one-liners for times where nobody laughs at a joke. Good luck!



Daniel
If it is to be, it is up to me.
cstreet_1986
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Another line I have just heard from Joe Pasquale (probably heard millions of times elsewhere as well, but the presentation was great):

"Don't mess this up lady - for you its a night out; for me its a career."

I have heard this line a number of times, but he uses it as though it isn't a one-liner, but rather an off-beat comment. The reaction from the audience and myself was fantastic.

Chris

P.S: Mandrake, 9 out of 10 for observation ;-)
larrymoore
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Most of my show is made of old jokes and people tend to miss them. When they don't get them, I look at them for a second and say, " That was a Joke. Just wanted to let you know!" Other times, when a joke falls flat, I use the line, " I don't write the jokes, I just tell them!" This comment usually gets me off the hook. For me, I use the oldest jokes and corny jokes. They tend to get the audience groaning and it keeps them staying. For me, this is the way I build a crowd. I tell old jokes and they keep laughing as if I am not the brightest crayon in the box. It works for me.
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